And so it begins again. The bravado, the Mohammed Ali-esque sound bites, the blunders, the sharp suits, writes David Lumb.
Yes you?ve got it: Lord Sugar is back for The Apprentice 2013 and don?t we all know about it.
The ninth series of the show started on BBC1 last night and there was no sign of a break in the formula that has pulled in the viewing figures over the years.
Start with a group of so-called high-flying businessmen and women.
Get them to boast spectacularly in front of a camera, give them a task a group of primary schoolchildren could complete then watch at least one of them fail miserably.
Get them into a ?board room?, get them to insult each other in the ?board room?, send them out of the ?board room?, ask the actress pretending to be a receptionist to invite the three worst candidates back in and then fire one dramatically (normally the quieter one) even though they never actually had a job in the first place.
Lord Sugar makes the show and he hit the ground running last night. ?I have a pile of CVs here and they?re full of the usual B.S,? he said. But he wasn?t the only one pulling the one liners.
?I have the sex appeal of Jessica Rabbit and a brain like Einstein!? declared 25-year-old mother-of-one Luisa Zissman, from St Albans.
And 27-year-old property firm chief executive Zeeshaan Shah said: ?I take inspiration from Napoleon; I am here to conquer.?
The show opened last night with a bread and butter flogging task.
Never-been-employed Jason Leech took charge of the boys while Jaz Ampaw-Farr who runs a literacy company snapped up the chance to take charge of the girls.
Ampaw-Farr is a former teacher and it couldn?t have been more obvious. ?What do you expect from your project manager?? she asked the group at the start of the task before following it up with ?And what do you think I expect from you??
It was agonisingly patronising (Sugar likened her approach to psyching up a bunch of school girls for a game of netball) and, coupled with her lack of genuine leadership, unsurprising when she became the first to be shown the door.
Tim Stillwell, the owner of a new restaurant planned for Merry Hill shopping centre, is the only West Midlands candidate this year.
The bookies? 5/1 shot from Birmingham got off to a mixed start last night. He was completely anonymous for the first half hour eventually securing footage time to sell a batch of high visibility jackets.
But this was followed by a couple of cringeworthy ?board room? moments including one where he tried to defend his performance in the task even though his team had won. Time will tell if he will be able to hold his own as the weeks go on.
So there we have it. They?re off and running.
Early signs suggest we can expect all the familiar clich?s: the shot of the losing team eating in the greasy spoon takeaway, the inquests into who is to blame, the backstabbing etc, etc, etc. And that?s just the way we like it.
Part two of the journey is at 9pm tonight, as two candidates hope to persuade Lord Sugar to invest in their drinks business.
Source: http://www.shropshirestar.com/entertainment/2013/05/08/tv-review-the-apprentice/
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